What causes a woman to be frigid? Get ready to take the 1st step to a better sex life. Remember the good old days of pre-COVID-19? We all keep talking about how bad things are now and that life was so much better prior to the pandemic. Were they really that good though?
We have always had a lot of contact from our customers; largely filled with requests for how to spice up their sex lives.
This is not confined to any one gender type, or age group, race, or location. There was always a series of common threads through many of the messages we received prior to the pandemic;
- Too tired for sex but my partner wants more.
- Sex isn’t as frequent as when they first got together.
- Looking after children has added to the issue based on how much time parenting uses up.
- Pressures and stress of modern-day life.
- The ageing process where sex just isn’t the same anymore.
Since the COVID-19 pandemic hit us all, huge numbers in countries all over the world have ended up losing their jobs and careers, been in isolation for long periods of time and at the same time home-schooling children has been a new task for so many of us.
On top of all that, people are worried about losing their homes due to their inability to pay rent, mortgages, car loans, credit card debt, student loans, as well as trying to pay for food and utilities.
If we were to strip away at all of the COVID-19 era messages we have received the list of reasons why many people are still not satisfied with their sex lives, then they would all lead back to that same list of 5 points above; just with a different number of pressures hanging above people.
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The interesting part to us in our industry is that we are also getting a lot of feedback from customers who are making the most of their time together with their partners.
This has often meant a huge rise in the romance and lovemaking stakes; right through to people being more adventurous in terms of when and where they are having sex, as well as trying new and/or different sex toys.
That is reflected in our sales, as we are definitely selling more adult sex toy products, answering more messages for advice and experiencing significantly more traffic through our website and in reading our Blogs.
The post-pandemic feedback from customers is real and is not something that will cure itself overnight. However, there were five or six very similarly themed messages that we received over the past month from very open and honest customers.
The general theme of those messages was that they had all experienced less than fulfilling sex lives prior to the pandemic; and that they were still feeling the same way now.
They all suggested that they had somewhat low self-esteem, worried about many things all the time, and felt that they were sexually unattractive or too shy to try anything new.
Those messages gave us something to think about, because essentially what our customers were telling us were ‘excuses’ for lack of sex, or sexual performance and satisfaction issues rather than the ‘reasons’ for those things.
What we do in our business is provide education to customers through our Blogs and our messages with customers so that they can look at different ways that they can recognize and then learn how to let go of those ‘excuses’.
The flip side to that is turning their negatives into positive so that they can then learn and recognize their new ‘reasons’ for their increased self-esteem and sexual satisfaction.
Adult sex toys have played a big part in that transformation in wondering what causes a woman to be frigid.
People may previously have had mental blocks to these products; often thinking it was kinky or dirty.
Adult sex toys are none of those things, as they are merely a way of getting partners to experiment with new ways of experiencing sexual pleasure.
Now that has to be good.
These are some of the ways we recommend to help you let go of your sexual roadblocks and star actually enjoying sex by exploring some of the adult sex toys that be a fun part of your sex life moving forwards.
We can all remember that famous scene in “When Harry met Sally” where Sally’s character played by Meg Ryan had a very vocal fake orgasm; prompting another character in the diner to ask the actress for “I’m having what she’s having”.
The beauty of some great adult sex toys is that you can get a great orgasm every time; whether on your own or with your partner.
Let us take you through some of the essentials that should be in your ‘collection’. Wherever possible we try to write in as gender-open as possible; after all sexual combinations can be anything in this era.
Everyone has ‘pleasure zones’ whether working them yourself or with one or more sexual partners.
Knowing what will pleasure you and can pleasure your partner is the first step on that path to greater sexual awareness and sexual satisfaction.
Here are our recommended products that are a must for your sexual war chest.
The frigidity cold ‘pleasure list’ – 2nd step of adult sex products that you should own & use
One of the greatest realizations of discovering and then using adult sex products is that you can pleasure more than one area at the same time.
This could be multiple zones on your own body, or the sheer pleasure that can be achieved by you and a partner (or partners) with sex at the same time. Here are 8 “must haves” that will help your lovemaking.
A good quality vibrator
You would think in this day and age that every household would have at least one vibrator hidden somewhere in the ‘undies’ drawer, beside table, or in the bathroom cabinet.
The simple fact is a ‘No’. That can be because of perceived guilt of someone finding it; shyness, low self-esteem, cultural reasons, etc.
However, irrespective of the above list of reasons some form of stimulation is needed for most people to orgasm. Women definitely need that clitoral stimulation to get a true orgasmic response.
We don’t tend to hear much about the male orgasm and many people just assume because a guy released a quantity of ejaculation fluid, then he reached orgasm.
That is true, however try comparing how much fluid he ejaculates if he or you masturbated him in a normal way.
Then, stimulate around his balls, cock, G-spot and even his anus while he is masturbating and you will see that he shoots a greater and thicker load of cum.
This is because he has been taken to a much deeper level of orgasm than usual.
From all of this we can learn that orgasm can be a singularly enjoyed experience for one, or a multi-shared experience with 2 or more people.
A good quality vibrator needs to be comfortable and easy to use; the last thing you want to be doing is having read complex operating instructions at an intimate moment.
Solve the question of what causes a woman to be frigid with a G-Spot stimulator
Women and men both have a G-spot and working it properly can bring some awesome responses; as discussed in the last point.
However, there are specific toys that have more than one ‘head’, so you can work more than one zone at the same time; eg, Clitoris or Anus at the same time as working the G-Spot.
Haven’t tried that experience? You need too right now as it will really bring you pleasure; deeply and quickly.
Different materials for different pleasures
The majority of ‘toys’ are made from materials such as latex.
However, rather than always using your battery-powered ‘toys’ what about trying something different like a glass dildo.
These are great for people who may be allergic to latex as well as for someone who like to experiment with their sex toys.
Because a glass ‘toy’ is a firmer material than say one made from latex, you can actually apply more pressure on the G-spot.
That means that the level of stimulation can be far greater too.
For that same stimulation reason you can also buy and use ‘toys’ made from metal.
A vibrating cock ring
If you, or the person you have sex with is a male, then a vibrating Cock Ring is another ‘must have’ for that sex chest that you are now building up.
Use is as simple as sliding the cock ring onto the erect cock of your man and switching it on.
He will get pleasure from the vibrating sensation and you too will receive awesome sensations (and orgasm) as he enters you with is vibrating away.
It makes no difference if you are a female and he is entering your vagina or butt, or whether you are another guy and he is entering your butt. Pleasure, pleasure and pleasure.
Butt plugs and toys
The title kind of says it all, but for the unitiated here is how it works.
Firstly; just relax.
Most people who have never tried anal sex tend to clench their butt cheeks together firmly, very firmly, just at the mention of this type of sex.
Forget it; even if you don’t like the idea, your sexual partner may really get off on it and those that are into anal sex tend to really love it.
Secondly; as with any sex toy, use a lot of lube. You don’t want your first experience to hurt because there isn’t enough lubricant.
Simply slide the toy in and enjoy the sensations as your butt gets a work out.
What causes a woman to be frigid – Try some double fun
If you have got over the idea of anal sex then now is also the time to consider ‘toys’ that help stimulate you and your partner at the same time.
Any couple’s vibrator has fun and flexibility in spades. If you are your partner are both female then there is the option of clitoris to clitoris stimulation; and also, the fun of clitoris to anus or anus to anus.
Those last two options; clitoris to anus or anus to anus, are also great for the female to male combo.
For the gay male couple, anus to anus sex where you both experience pleasure and orgasm is great for sexual stimulation.
Fix frigidity cold bedrooms with ropes, ribbons and more
Only you can assess how advanced your sex life is and what sort of fun you could add to your sexual experiences.
Perhaps you could spice things up a bit through the use of ropes or ribbons, in a variety of mild to wild bedroom bondage. See our guide ‘The Definitive Rope Bondage Guide’ for more tips to help you.
Lets just keep this one simple; if you are penetrating your body or that of a partner using any part of your body or any adult sex product, always use lube.
You want the experience of sex to be pleasant and a lack of lube can hurt some people. If you are wondering what causes a woman to be frigid, then getting some high quality lube will help the situation when you get to sex.
Remember that we all age and it is quite normal that our body creates less natural lubricant as we age; always buy and use a good quality commercial lube instead.
Adult porn – the 3rd step that may just help with the question on what causes a woman to be frigid
Some people are addicted to adult porn; either watching or masturbating to when on their own.
In other cases; couples can get off on it as a way of spicing things up a bit in the lovemaking department.
It may also be a case of singles or couples filming their own masturbation or lovemaking because they love to watch it back.
Whatever the reason for watching porn, if it is good quality, adult-performers only on the porn then it is good clean fun.
When thinking of your own relationship and improving your sex life we have listed 8 “must haves” for your lovemaking “pleasure list”.
You know yourself and your partner better than anyone else.
You may have identified things on that “pleasure list” that are a little too adventurous for you – if only at this stage.
Where porn can be great is for couples to filter the online porn videos by particular styles of sex, or technique so that you could watch, discuss, agree on boundaries, then give things a try.
That way you can play the video over and use it as a way to learn and to demystify things that previously you deemed too kinky for you.
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What causes a woman to be frigid – An overall summary
The first thing that springs to mind for us when raising this topic is “discussion”.
The channels of communication have to remain open, and they have to be appropriate, honest, vulnerable (if necessary), respectful and mutually agreed upon if you are asking yourself what causes a woman to be frigid.
The whole point of couples trying to rekindle intimacy in their relationships is because the relationship still matters to them.
They just want some extra magic and sexual satisfaction.
Perhaps one party has an issue and it hasn’t been discussed; or maybe both parties are suffering silently.
This blog topic is meant to table some ideas that we know work, and based on customer feedback, there are plenty of people out there with a similar situation they want to improve.
Go through this blog together; discuss what could work, may never work, or maybe worth looking at exploring to see if it could work.
We would love to get your feedback on how things went for you and your partner.
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